Report Card: Plaza Azteca

 

Plaza Azteca

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Overall GrubGrade C

 

The Breakdown:

 

Atmosphere: Grade B: If you bothered to read our previous post, then you’ll know that Keagan’s Irish Pub won the prize for the best place we dined at during our vacation. On the flip side of that coin, Plaza Azteca wins the prize for the worst. We stopped at the Plaza Azteca in Williamsburg to kill some time before we checked into our next hotel. We’d have been better served just taking a nap in the car. On the plus side, Plaza Azteca was huge – both outside and inside. But, it probably doesn’t cost too much to build a warehouse-sized restaurant when most of it appears to be built of plastic. The place looked clean, but the other diners…not so much. We followed a young couple into the restaurant, and the female of the pair looked like she was wearing an outfit she outgrew a decade ago. Yummy. The place was fairly quiet, but also fairly empty. That should have been our first clue as to what was to come.

High marks: Large and quiet

Low marks: Cheap looking and cheap feeling

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Service: Grade C: Sometimes the language barrier we encounter when dining at Mexican restaurants can seem funny or even cute. However, in the case of Plaza Azteca, this was not the case. We had to practically shout our order slowly, even though the place was quiet, and the look of confusion on our server’s face did not bode well for a good outcome. That being said, our server got everything correct, but was very flat. We were served with minimal to no enthusiasm. Wait time for drinks and dishes was acceptable, but we can’t shake the feeling that the only reason the service wasn’t a complete disaster was good old-fashioned luck. Asking questions about the items on the menu was definitely out of the question, and a small mix-up with our drinks really left us disappointed.

High marks: Normal wait time for food and drinks

Low marks:   Bland service, huge language barrier

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Food/Spirits: Grade C: Plaza Azteca has a banana margarita on the menu (cue violins). However, these margaritas had no banana flavor at all. They did have some unidentified fruity taste, but it wasn’t banana (false alarm on those violins). Katina also ordered a raspberry mojito, but received a raspberry margarita instead. She toughed it out and drank it, because who knows what would have come from the bar had she sent it back. For her entrée, Katina ordered the chicken fajitas (as you can see, she’s branching out) which she characterized as average at best. Definitely not the best she’s had, but she claims not the worst either (I bet if you challenge her to name where she got worse chicken fajitas, she couldn’t answer, though). I ordered a dish called Chori-Steak. From the menu description, it should have been heavenly. An 11 ounce NY strip covered in chorizo and cheese sauce. I can vouch for the cheese sauce, and I think there was chorizo on the other meat. The NY strip, on the other hand, was suspect. Almost beef jerky like in texture and toughness, the meat was pretty much just gristle wrapped in a lovely layer of fat. I ended up leaving the steak and just ate the sausage, beans, and rice. You have to understand that my leaving steak on the plate is equivalent to Steve Buscemi winning a best smile contest – it just doesn’t happen (we love you Steve…but that grill is something else). We were quite disappointed with the entrees. On a final note, even the chips and salsa were substandard, with stale chips and a salsa that tasted like it came from a jar.

High marks:  Great menu descriptions

Low marks: Execution on the entrees left a lot to be desired

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Value: Grade C: It really doesn’t matter how much we spent, the poor food quality and almost painful service does not allow us to consider Plaza Azteca a good value. In fact, we recommend passing right on by the place. If you do pull in, do yourself a favor and take a nap instead of going in. When you wake up, use your navigation system to find a better place.

High marks: None

Low marks: Poor quality and service

 

 

Report Card: Shorty’s Diner

Shorty’s Diner

 

http://shortysdinerva.com/

Overall GrubGrade B+

 

The Breakdown:

 

Atmosphere: Grade B: We almost missed Shorty’s Diner. According to my navigation unit, Shorty’s is on the wrong side of the street. I know what you’re going to say, Shorty, and you can save it. You need to pick yourself up and move to the other side of the street so we’re not all confused.

Shorty’s Diner (despite not being where it is supposed to be) was a real authentic looking diner on the inside. The booths and tables seemed to be really clean, and our silverware and other dining utensils passed inspection. We stopped by Shorty’s for some breakfast, and while the diner was doing pretty brisk business, none of the staff seemed overwhelmed.

High marks: Clean and authentic looking

Low marks: Someone built it on the wrong side of the street – my nav unit doesn’t lie!

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Service: Grade B+: Breakfast, in our humble opinion, is probably one of the harder meals to serve. There is usually not much patience in waiting for the first meal of the day, and that coffee better be fresh and constantly being poured in our mugs for us to be happy. With that being said, our server pulled it off. There was nothing really spectacular about the service, but everything came out correctly and there was minimal wait for the server when we needed her.

High marks: Solid and accurate service

Low marks:   Nothing special about the service

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Food/Spirits: Grade B+: We just had coffee and orange juice to drink (with some chocolate milk for Morgan) since this was breakfast (despite what you may think, we are not animals). Morgan ordered French Toast, Katina opted for the biscuits and gravy, and I selected the Meat Lover’s omelet. The French toast was scrumptious, as evidenced by how our daughter swallowed each piece with minimal chewing. She could give an anaconda pointers on how to swallow a meal whole. The toast was thick and sweet and rich, and according to Morgan, might be even better than my French toast, which I’ve heard is pretty awesome. Katina’s really enjoyed the biscuits and gravy. The sausage in the gravy had a nice kick, and the portion size was on the generous side. In a word, she thought they were delicious. The Meat Lover’s omelet was also good. It had a really nice flavor, but it was a little too light on the cheese. According to Shorty’s menu, the omelet is supposed to be “stuffed” with cheddar cheese. I’m not exactly sure there was ANY cheese in the omelet (which is kind of one of the characterizing ingredients of an omelet). However, the omelet was still really good.

High marks:  Fantastic French toast and awesome biscuits and sausage gravy    

Low marks: Minimal to no cheese on an omelet advertised as “stuffed” with cheese

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Value: Grade A-: We left Shorty’s just shy of having to unbutton our pants/shorts, which is a good sign when it comes to rating portion size. The quality of food was good enough to take us by surprise, and topping out at $31 after tip, we felt Shorty’s Diner was a real bargain. You could probably do a lot worse if you’re in the neighborhood than Shorty’s – just make sure when your navigation system tells you an empty lot is your destination, you look across the street.

High marks: Great value and high quality food along with really good portion size

Low marks: Some might find $31 a little high for breakfast (not us)

Honorable Mention: Pierce’s Pitt BBQ

Pierce’s Pitt — in the middle of nowhere

http://www.pierces.com/

I was absolutely certain that both my wife (who seems to have a Magellan-like sense of direction) and my navigation unit had completely lost it on the way to Pierce’s Pitt. We got off the exit from I64 West and drove through this tiny little speck of civilization that’s usually present off of most highway exits (you know…the standard gas station or two along with at least a McDonald’s). Then we proceeded to leave this little hamlet of society and drive into the wilderness. At any moment, I was expecting someone in a jacked up pick-up truck to force me off the road. The last things I would hear would be Dueling Banjos playing from the truck’s open windows and some hayseed with less teeth than fingers telling me I had “a real pretty mouth.”

Thankfully, in the midst of the acres and acres of woods, we came upon Pierce’s Pitt. Couldn’t miss the building if you tried because 1) It was huge and 2) It’s the only building around. Despite the remote location, there were a ton of people dining at Pierce’s Pitt. It was inexplicable.

Pierce’s gets the “Honorable Mention” treatment because it was essentially fast food (although in our case, not so fast at all), and thus we had no server to speak of. And despite quite a few bbq-themed selections on the menu, Katina and I both decided to order the catfish (we were planning on having barbecue when we got back to Ohio, so there you have it). We ordered, took our number and our empty drink cups, and then found one of the few vacant booths to kick back in.

Then we waited…and waited…and waited. We were number 41, and I am pretty sure they were almost out of the 60s when they called our number. I was hoping for an experience that would blow my socks off, but it was not to be. There was a pretty good amount of catfish with each dinner, along with a heaping mound of French fries. The catfish was good, but by no means the best I’ve had. Katina’s Granny can make some mean catfish in a pot in the back yard that would make Pierce’s catfish seem like canned tuna. The breading was a touch overcooked, but the filets themselves were tasty, if not a little overly crunchy. As for the fries…very good. But when the best part of the meal is the French fries or the hush puppies, then that speaks volume about the rest of the food. To be fair to Pierce’s, however, we did not get anything barbecued, and since that is obviously their specialty, maybe the saucy stuff is better. We have to recommend Pierce’s if you’re in the area, primarily because we’re not sure there’s any other choice. When you go, though, opt for some barbecue and let us know if it was as good as you hoped it would be. And one final note – the barbecue we had once we got back to Columbus was the bomb!

Report Card: Captain Tom’s Seafood

One of the yummy seafood platters available at Captain Tom’s

http://www.captaintomsseafood.com/

Overall GrubGrade B+

 

The Breakdown:

Atmosphere:  Grade B:  It is kind of difficult to describe Captain Tom’s Seafood.  From the outside, it looks nothing like a seafood restaurant, but on the inside it definitely looks like a seafood restaurant.  The exterior of Captain Tom’s Seafood is pretty nondescript.  The inside has some appropriate seafood-type decorations.  There is a lot of space in Captain Tom’s, which allows for generous spacing between tables.  Captain Tom’s stays pretty busy, so it’s a good thing there lots of space for lots of tables.  We’re not sure if Captain Tom’s stays busy because of the quality of food or because of lack of options, but it’s probably a combination of both.

High marks:  Lots of space

Low marks:   Generic exterior

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Service:  Grade B:  Captain Tom’s Seafood is not an upscale seafood restaurant.  As such, we really do not have high expectations for the service.  At Captain Tom’s, we really just expect someone to bring out our food when it’s done and keep our drinks topped off, which describes the level of service at Captain Tom’s pretty accurately.  Here’s a tip from us to you – it you have to take your check up to the cashier after you eat yourself, then you shouldn’t have high expectations for your service (i.e. Bob Evans).  That being said, our servers at Captain Tom’s did indeed bring out our food and keep our drinks topped off, hence the grade of “B.”

High marks:  Solid service

Low marks:   Not much effort involved with service

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Food/Spirits:  Grade B+:  We have family that live in the Martinsville, Va area, so Captain Tom’s Seafood has kind of become a tradition in our family.  We usually visit once each time we go see our relatives.  The nice thing about Captain Tom’s is the seafood is really good, the hush puppies are excellent, and you get so much food it kind of takes your breath away.  We always get combination platters with different types of fish, shrimp, etc.  We consistently find the food to be well prepared and tasty.  Hush puppies are savory and lightly breaded, popcorn shrimp is breaded nicely and has a nice pop to it when you bite into them, and the fish is always perfectly seasoned and breaded, with light, flaky fillets.  The food is brought piled high in baskets, and you’d be lucky to finish everything they put in front of you.  The fries and slaw provided as sides aren’t going to rock your world, but who cares?  You probably aren’t going to be able to eat it anyway.

High marks:  Really good food, and a ton of it    

Low marks:  You’re going to have to scrap the diet for the day

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Value:  Grade A:  Obviously, with the quality of food and the massive portion size, it’s not hard to see why Captain Tom’s Seafood gets an “A” for value.  If, for some ungodly reason, you have the occasion to visit Martinsville, Va, you should really stop by Captain Tom’s Seafood for some great grub.  It might be the best option you’ve got.

High marks:   Huge portions, excellent food

Low marks:  Seafood leftovers do not microwave well